Pregnancy and the Trigger

Pregnancy and the Trigger

I hope you had a good start to the week. I am looking forward to sharing my travel details soon, as I am getting some much needed time away. Some of the experiences that I am still working through are sad. As a part of a community of grieving angel moms, one word we know well is triggering. It’s a term we use to identify something that brings us back to those moments in the early stages of our loss, or a feeling described as a punch in the stomach, reminding us of how much we lost. Recovery is not as much as a return. A return to normal. I still don’t know how to live every day.

The summer has been a blessing and atrigger. While I am using every ounce of my being ensuring I stay positive and active for my son, I have more than enough times where I feel like crying. A picture of a baby at the age my daughter would have been, or something I wish I could buy her, is what it could be. I get up and get dressed and make it work. I need to. No! I would like to. I want to make the most of my life, because I know what it’s like to have your life cut short and not have a chance to enjoy it. He would like me to. I want to be a good mother, a strong woman, and a reflective and caring human. I am happy with it.

I like to feel pretty when I get up. I would tell her things. There are pleats. The shoulder is elegant tie dye shorts. It makes me feel pretty elegant having them both in this grey top. I wore the top one size bigger than my usual size because it was loose enough to cover a pair of shorts.

I don’t wear denim shorts like a girl, so the fact that I wear them and feel good about myself is a miracle. The flowing shirt gives the look some shape while the shorts only open at the bottom. I know that feeling beautiful and confident is an important part of the healing puzzle, so I put the effort into trying something new.

Anthropologie ruffled top is on sale.

If you know someone who is going through a challenging time dealing with loss or other pregnancy difficulty, please direct them to First Candle, an organization that provides a wonderful source of comfort.

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